I just thought life would be a little different. You know when you are growing up and setting goals. You are always asked where you see yourself in five years or ten years. When I was 18, I was Miss Moses Lake and had to do a lot of interviewing. That was a question I had to answer a million times. It has now been 5 years and here I am. On paper I am exactly who I wanted to be. I graduated from BYU in Sociology (I thought I would have graduated in Athletic Training which was definitely not for me), but I graduated. I am married to a pretty amazing guy. I have two children and I stay at home and take care of them every day. In my mind I pictured myself much more put together, organized, motivated and let's be honest, prettier. I pictured myself as the person who had it all. Okay, so I am still working on it. I am working on getting it all put together, but I think we constantly are. We are also constantly comparing our worsts selves to other peoples very best. We see what they allow us to see and in turn we only allow them to see parts of our lives. For example, I have the worst hair when I wake up in the morning (every girl on drill team could attest to that). I don't take pictures of myself when I wake up and put them on my blog. I share the pictures I take after I have showered, blow dried, sprayed, and controlled the mane. We are definitely not expected to wake up looking like they do in the movies. So, here is to BED HEAD! metaphorically and literally.
p.s. My Bed Head these days is that most days I don't shower, I have a hard time keeping my house vacuumed, and I wish I would get to reading my scriptures more.
8 comments:
You should not feel bad at all. Your baby is so tiny still--I think even the best of people aren't "put together" for a long while after having a new baby. I know I feel like I'm a walking zombie the first 4 months or so. I am guessing it just gets harder as you have more and more. Sheesh.
I totally understand though. I really thought I would have this mom thing down. The kids crying bothers me more than I thought it would--I don't discipline as well as I thought I would... I let them watch way too much TV, and let's be honest--I'm seriously FAT (not just pregnant, actually FAT) right now. Super depressing. But you know what? I just try to take it one day at a time and remember that kids are a blessing--a trial but also a blessing.
xoxo
The best part about that, by the way, is that you're your heavenly father's child--which means you're his blessing too.
Bridget
I have the perfect most prettiest sister ever...with the cutest and most fun niece ever and I am sure jesse will be the awesomest coolest nephew...Danielle you are honestly the best only year older sister ever!! Thanks for everything..
Love it! I mean the whole honesty thing about trying to get it all together! Isn't that the truth. Erik taught me "when we put one thing in order, something else goes out of order". I like that, and now you are putting your little family in order, you can clean your house and do your hair, but it won't be your top priority for a while! :)
Oh Danielle, you are awesome, even if you don't get to your hair every day. I was just thinking today, about where I was ten years ago, (I shudder to think that I can do that) and I've come so far in how my house is, how much I'm getting done, etc. The difference is that all my kids are old! When your family is all about you, things fall by the wayside. Don't sweat it. Everything in it's season. Love you!
Danielle, I loved this post and it reminded me of how demanding those early years are. I remember people telling me "enjoy them while they're young, they're much harder as teenagers" and I swore I'd never say that. No matter what. And I haven't, because anybody who remembers those early years with little kids remembers it can be very discouraging -- the loneliness, the exhaustion, the anxiety. Mothering is grand and it requires lots of work and patience at every age.
I have bed head without all of your beautiful curls. Now THAT's ugly.
I loved everyone's comments on this post. They're true. So true.
I'm glad to know I'm not the only one with "bedhead." And Emree still looks adorable with her bedhead! She looks so old!
Well I don't suffer from literal bed head cuz people with straight hair don't have too much trouble with that but the metaphoric bed head I can relate to! I firmly believe that "Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans." It's generally true on a grand scale and on the day to day stuff. You're awesome Danielle - just keep it up!
Love it and Love you!! I am so glad you blog about these things because I can totally relate to you and it makes me feel a little more normal. :)
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